photo credit: Juliann Gates
“If you knew that your life was merely a phase or short, short segment of your entire existence, how would you live? Knowing nothing ‘real’ was at risk, what would you do? You’d live a gigantic, bold, fun, dazzling life. You know you would. That’s what the ghosts want us to do – all the exciting things they no longer can” – Chuck Palahniuk
She stands as a colossal Victorian deteriorating like a forgotten cathedral on the Philadelphia street corner of Broad and Fairmount. The days of elegance and grandeur have passed away beneath the tomb of her hollow arches only to re-emerge with an even more distinct majesty and allure.
Lorraine beckoned to me for years, her towering presence and asbestos dust seeped beneath my skin. It was only a matter of time until I’d find my way deep into the heart of her presence. From a cold black basement chasing light up a swirling marble staircase up ten stories to a massive penthouse ballroom turned hollow shell of abandonment. Where once the melodic clinking of silverware on fine china clattered against the muffled laughter and chatter of hundreds of guests dressed in their classiest attire was now condensed to a faint whisper in a slow swirl of white dust against sunlight peeking through empty arched window frames. Continue reading “An Appointment With The Divine” »
And as I am caught up into total surrender to The Master Artist, I become thrilled with something infinitely greater than myself
The maintenance and upkeep for just one person living in America is not easy. Between taxes, rent, student loans, cell-phone and car payments, medical insurance, self-image and style, clothing and appearance, peer-pressure and social or career status just to name a few major things, it’s difficult to keep up and sometimes even harder to keep track. In “The Land of The Free” we live completely under the burden of ourselves, a sort of slavery that is the furthest thing from freedom. We have no choice but to be forced into a system and a society that is utterly self-consumed and has to be in order to survive in it.
Oswald Chambers wrote that if a person gives in to selfishness, they will find it to be the most enslaving tyranny on earth. There’s nothing more incredible than having your perspective flipped on its head. When I first returned from Africa back in 2006, I realized with a new set of eyes that I had unknowingly lived in bondage. It was heartbreaking because I was suddenly made aware of the truth while others went about their lives completely unconscious of the slavery, having never known. Continue reading “The Burden of Self” »
How blessed am I that I get to see my lover every day? To feel and taste and embrace her, to gaze upon her as if it’s the first time I’ve ever seen her, to be captivated by her as if she’s still to this day the most beautiful thing I have ever laid eyes on.
I had spent New Year’s Eve in New York City and had just gotten back to my apartment in Ocean City. I woke up early on the second day of 2014 and spent the morning with the mist shrouded ocean. Forever the water moved; not for one moment since creation had it been still. Standing there as I stood countless times, I thanked my lover for making me feel humble, inspired, tiny and salty all at once. No matter what, I always wanted to be around her or close to her. Continue reading “My Lover (Pt. I)” »