a holiday from real

As one of Peter Pan’s Lost Boys, it would only make sense that I would escape turning another year older by a few hours.  Besides, there’s no place I rather spend my birthday than a beautiful coast that is both warm and sunny.. for me: uncharted territory and experience.. something fresh.

After weeks and weeks of endless rain and dreary depressing weather, I’m escaping this coast and heading to the other, down and to the left.

I had a very special feeling the first time I visited Los Angeles.  There was a clear unprecedented sentiment that swept over me and I couldn’t deny this rather unexpected sensational connection.  Though it wasn’t the Chinese Theater or the Hollywood sign or the amazing beaches that stood out to me or made the most impact.. it was one morning at an ordinary Beverly Hills diner that really stirred me and left a spell of inspiration.  For some odd reason it was a moment I would never forget for the rest of my life.  Such a simple and subtle instance that overcame me, churning my stomach with a confident but uncertain hopefulness.  A premonition per say.

Something extraordinary was happening that morning inside the ordinary Nate ‘n Al’s diner on North Beverly Drive.  As stirred my coffee and buttered my pancakes, a group of producers sat talking together in the adjacent booth.  They were discussing one of their upcoming films, how incredible it was going to be, how they wanted and expected their audience to feel at a particular scene, hidden symbolism within, what they wanted viewers to take away from their masterful art, emotions to release, thoughts and ideas to convey.  They talked about how well written the story-line and screenplay was and the creative ideas that stood behind the film.

My heart hurt, because I knew that could be me.  I have ideas and stories that I am so confident in, masterful works that were given to my brain by the Divine, ideas that with the right connections would turn Hollywood upside down and influence society and culture in a bold, ingenous Rowling-esque way.  Because the goal isn’t to live forever, but to create something that will.  Because the unreal is always more powerful than the real.  The unreal is eternal.  A part of me just wanted to lean over, slip them my business card and say, “Listen, you don’t know me, but I have at least one real story for you.  Game changers.  Money makers.  Art that could be legendary.  Just contact me if you’re interested.”  Sure, they might have laughed, but if I was confident in what I said, what artistic person who thrives off of creativity would ignore that?  I know I sure wouldn’t.

Looking back I wonder why I just didn’t do it.  Maybe God had set it up for me and I missed it.  Though if it’s part of the plan it will work out in some other way.  The most ironic part is that one of my stories that I am most confident in begins with a “nobody” at a diner who finds himself wrapped up in the biggest story of all time.

I find myself at an uncertain yet extremely fascinating season in my life.  Twenty years from being 23 I know I will only be more disappointed by the things I didn’t do than by the ones I did do. So here’s to throwing off the bowlines, sailing away from the safe harbor, catching the trade winds in my sails, being wild, rudderless, off to explore, discover and dream big..

So I’m going to scope things out.. reunite with friends.. become inspired.  Besides, it’s a place that holds my heart, in more ways than just one  <3